A fictional election consultancy is struggling to explain how a tiny sea slug won widespread public affection without commissioning a single professionally lit photograph of itself near a factory.
The candidate's platform consisted of being green, very small and quietly getting on with life. Campaign strategists described this as dangerously lacking a narrative.
An adviser offered to improve its appeal by making it appear more relatable. The slug continued eating algae, which the adviser said could be presented as a story about ordinary household priorities if somebody could locate a kitchen suitable for filming.
Its use of material derived from algae prompted questions about energy policy. The campaign declined to promise lower bills by Thursday and was accused of refusing to engage with hardworking families.
Opposition researchers examined its record and found no expense claims, lobbying meetings or abandoned leadership pledges. They have requested more time, arguing that a creature this small could conceal a great deal by simply remaining difficult to see.
The slug's apparent advantage is that voters know exactly what it is. Consultants consider this a risky approach for any serious candidate.
A victory speech has been prepared on its behalf. The slug will not deliver it, having already returned to its principal occupation. Early polling suggests this is the most popular part of the campaign.
