Two anonymous wax figures at a fictional museum have been moved to a new room after failing to participate constructively in discussions about where they belonged.
The institution's placement committee considered several options: Heritage, Celebrity, Difficult Family Conversations and the corridor between two gift shops. The final decision reflects both visitor flow and the availability of a socket for the dehumidifier.
A spokesman described the relocation as a carefully considered response to changing public expectations. Staff described it as moving the heavy ones again.
The figures have neither endorsed nor disputed the arrangement. Their continued silence has nevertheless generated competing interpretations, three opinion columns and a demand that they explain themselves in a televised interview.
Museum visitors expressed mixed reactions. One felt the previous positioning had implied too much closeness. Another felt the new positioning implied a deliberate distance. A third wanted to know where the toilets were.
The committee is developing a more flexible display system in which public figures can be repositioned according to the latest breakfast-television discussion. Wheels have been recommended as a cheaper alternative to institutional certainty.
For now, the figures remain still, polished and available for photographs. An internal review has concluded that they are coping with the publicity exceptionally well.
